Friday, June 20, 2014

My Parents Do NOT Support My Singing Career! What Do I Do?


My Parents Do Not Support My Singing Career! What Do I Do?

I received this note on line today. See if you can relate....

"Hi Wendy,  I'm a young singer and I was wondering if you can please do a video about parents not wanting there kids to be singers. Cause my mom today was like "I don't get it.  I never here you sing the songs your voice teacher teaches you, and now your singing random songs"

In my head I know I can sing whatever I want but my mom thinks I can't, she always doubts me. I know one day when I become a good singer that she will be like "I was proud to see her become a good singer and take around places to perform it was stressful but I knew she would do it one day." 

Like there is an Open Mic happening not far from where I live and I want to enter by my mom is doing nothing to help me. I'm a kid, I can't just walk up and register. But I know I might not win but I'm trying my best until I'm going to win! My parents just never in a million zillion life times would understand unless if I become someone like Taylor Swift or Jodie Foster."


Wow. I DO get that. I understand exactly what this person is saying. And I have to tell you, your parents may NEVER support your singing career. Oh well. But you can STILL HAVE AN AMAZING CAREER! You have to follow your heart. It's YOUR life. Your Dream. Your skills, Your Talent, Your Goals, Your Time, Your Money. You can do whatever you want in life as long as you are not causing harm to others. 

However, until you are 18 you have to follow their rules if you live in their house. They may not understand show business, nor feel comfortable with you going it to it. It's not a sure-thing like becoming a mechanic, lawyer, teacher. The pay isn't steady or reliable for most actors or singers. In fact most performers have 2nd careers which really pay the bills. Veterinarians that sing with their local choir, teachers that act in their local community theaters, business owners who also make movies on the side.

Your parents "no" is out of care, fear and concern for your well-being. They want you to have a successful life. There are so many things you can do to create a successful, artistic life if that is who you are. I live a creative life: acting, singing, managing talent, coaching actors, speaking, teaching, writing books and blogs, and I love it. I can't see myself doing anything else... And I never could. But your parents are not the enemy (unless they are abusing you and in that case call 911 and report them) 

If they are concerned for your future that is ok, they should be. You need to respect your parents. And you can still become an actor or singer later if that is what you want to do. I'll give you 2 important pieces of advice:

1) TRAIN HARD.  In business and as an actor. It's called SHOW BUSINESS for a reason. You need to learn about the show and business. Yes study acting, read acting books, watch online acting classes, read actor autobiographies (tons of them) interviews with actors, take online classes, in person classes for acting. Learn about Business. Read business books, read autobiographies of successful business people, learn about sales and how to sell, take Business classes. You need BOTH. Being an actor means owning your own business, and YOU are the product you are selling. You need to get good at sales. 

2) Watch this:

So how can you do it? In a smart way of course. I'll teach you. It's... a STRATEGY.

1. First thing. This is a must. Take care of all your responsibilities at home and at school. Do well in School. Get good grades, do your homework, be on time for school, keep your room clean, help out around the house. If this is done your parents will be happier. You will be demonstrating responsibility. They still might not support your singing career, but they would be wrong to complain about any of that. I mean if you are doing all that, you got EVER RIGHT to go sing. Okay?

Lesson 2. Get a job; babysitting, at McDonalds, dog walking, selling lemonade in the park...whatever you can do to make money, legally. Accumulate it, save it. Save up and use your OWN money to take private singing lessons. That way you are not putting ANY financial struggle on your parents for your singing career. They can't argue you with you about that. They can I suppose...but they have NO reason to. Stay calm and carry on. GET TRAINED. Training is SO critical. You must learn how to sing properly and control your voice. Take FREE lessons at your school, sing in the Choir, The Glee Club, Chorus, do Musical Theater. If they don't let you train in person with someone -look online and everyday practice with all the signing training exercises you can find on You Tube.

Using this strategic approach, you will also be showing your well meaning, but oblivious or confused parents just how mature you are! And how hard you are willing to work for your goals. Most people tend to respect people like that, I know sure do. And if your parents are still complaining, well... they ain't got no reason to complain. They just are. So you just relax and carry on, knowing you ain't doing NOTHING wrong. Okay?

Listen, kids you can trust me. I have been a singer for 25+ years. Here is a funny story. When I was in school I sang every day in my house after Junior High and High School. I sang for  3 hours every day after I came home from school and before I stated by homework, My dad didn't even notice.

When I was 19, I went to sing Kareoke in the mall after school. My dad didn't even know because he thought I was just shopping when he dropped me off:). I jot a job selling bonsai trees in the mall and on my break every day I went and sang in the Kareoke booth. I entered a singing contest in my home town and my Daddy came to see me sing. Afterward he was shocked. He said two things to me I''ll never forget. 1)"Wendy, when did you learn to do that?"

(okay...I smiled at my father but I said to to myself ... uh ...duh... every day! 2 hours a day practicing for 6 years right in front of you at home, plus 1 year of voice at college for  2 semesters... duh) But I kept smiling at my handsome daddy. I was amazed that he had no idea that I could sing living right under the same roof all my life. Geez. Okay...

Then he looked me right in they eye, smiled with pride and say mater of factly, "Wendy it looks like you belong up there." I was so happy to hear that, and of course...Yes I did belong up on stage signing. I always knew that.  I didn't wait for any parent of mine to support my singing career.

3. Get professional coaching from a working singer in your home town if you can find one or on Skype. If you work and save your money maybe they will let you pay for the classes yourself.

If acting and singing is your passion no one is going to stop you from doing it. You will always find a way to do it. When I was growing up I spent hours in my room singing to music and taping myself, then listening back and teaching myself how to sing in key by copying the notes I heard Precisely. If the note was not exactly the same tone I would do it over and over and over for hours until it was. I did that for 6 years after school and on weekends. I listened to Mariah Carey and learned how to do everything she could, and that taught me how to control my voice.

Practice. Practice. Practice.

4. NEXT and SO, SO, SO IMPORTANT. When you turn 18, or get your parents permission, you must go Sing LIVE every chance and everywhere you can. To the girl who wrote me the letter up there. Why can't you walk right up to that Kareoke and ENTER? Sometimes Bowling Alleys have Karaoke, and restaurant and birthday parties. Do it. Kids can accomplish great things. You can to. Believe me. Your parents may, or may not support your singing career. But you know its what you want to do.... so do it right where you are. Enter local singing contests. Ask your parents if you can go sing at nursing homes to the old people. Then call the nursing homes and ask what day you can go in and sing a few songs to the old folks. They NEED excitement and entertainment. Share your gift. See if you can sing the National Anthem at your schools Sports games.

5. GET MORE KNOWLEDGE OF HOW TO BUILD A SINGING CAREER. Read. Read articles month internet, read autobiographies of famous singers.If you like you can read my e-book "How To Be A Singing Star Right Where You Are." You can get it online at Paypal HERE.
Or you can send away for it in the mail it's just $10. Save your allowance and build your singing career. With that book you will have me to guide you, to believe in you, to encourage you, to support you. Parents don't always understand. And that's okay. They do they best they can with what they've got and how they were raised. But growing up means each of us finds our OWN way.

My e-book "How To Be A Singing Star Right Where You Are" is something you can do all on your own. I teach singers how to become a singer writer where you are- It teaches you how to find the right songs to sing, how to meet other musicians, how to get your songs recorded professionally and for cheap, what songs should you sing live, how to sell your songs online, on ebay, cd baby, iTunes etc. You will learn how to get booked with other musicians, how to find venues you can play, how to join or start a band, how to write your own songs, shoot your own music videos, how to meet booking agents, get a music manager, get a record deal, get your songs in film and TV. This book offers other brilliant music biz resources you can read. You MUST have this e-book. I wish I had this book when I was starting out. I had to figure all of this out on my own, but since I have already done all that, you can learn from my experience.

I have been a professional singer for 20 years. My videos have been on VH1, MTV and BET. My songs have been on the radio, in TV shows, films and commercials. I have made money singing and recorded 3 solo CDs which you can find here on CD BABY Online Store. I know how to get you started as a professional singer because I have done it too! Follow my advice, it works!

Me recording my CD "As I Am" in the Studio

Okay...I will give you one SECRET from my book: Super Stars know this. You need to sing regularly in public everywhere you can. 


  • Churches
  • Schools
  • Fairs
  • Farmers Markets
  • Nursing Homes,
  • Kiwanis Clubs
  • Lions Clubs
  • Knights Of Columbus
  • Elks Clubs
  • Fundraisers
  • Charity Events
  • Family Events
  • Have A Concert In Your Backyard And Sing For Your Neighbors, Family And Friends
  • Enter Every Singing Contest, Competition And Talent Show Within At Least A 100-200 Mile Radius
  • Colleges Or University Events. Call The Events Department
  • At Colleges And See If There Is A Local Event You Can Sing At.
  • Country Fairs
  • Art Galleries
  • People Homes At Private Parties
  • Sing The National Anthem At Every Sporting Event In Your
  • Community And Surrounding Communities, Towns And States
  • Sing At Local Corporate Events
  • Major Or Local Political Events
  • Weddings
  • Bar Mitzvahs, Bat Mitzvahs
  • New Years Eve Parties
  • Fashion Shows, Zoos, Etc.
  • Sing On Local TV Show Or Radio Stations
  • Open For Musicians Or Big Acts Visiting Your Local Town
  • Sing At Local Music/Night Clubs
  • Coffee Houses
  • Hotel Bars
  • Restaurants
  • BBQ’s
  • PTA Benefits
  • Wedding Anniversary
  • Funeral
  • Picnics
  • Halloween Parties
  • Spring Or Fall Festivals
  • Weiner And Marshmallow Roasts
  • Christmas Revues
  • Department Stores Events
  • Children’s Hospital
  • Veterans Clubs
  • Annual Christmas Dinner Dances
  • Local Circus
  • Museum Fundraiser
  • Find Out Where Your Local Open Mics Are And Go Sing At them!
  • Local events in small towns sometimes sound like this… 
  • The Annual Milk Fund Benefit
  • Auxiliary American Legion Show,
  • Rainbow Girl’s Valentine Day Dance
  • Campfire Girl’s St.
  • Patrick’s Day Lunch, 
  • Safeway Employees Association Benefit, 
  • Yacht Club, 
  • Big Time Revue Vaudeville Night…Sing at those too!
  • Put on a concert at your local church. Create flyers. Invite everyone you know. Friends, family, teachers, post them allout. Invite other people you know to sing with you, Take charge of your life.
  • Sing On Local Jingles For Local Businesses.
  • Audition for local musical theater groups and get experience
  • On stage and working professionally. Later, you may be ready to move to New York to audition for Broadway if that is your dream!
  • On You Tube
  • Audition for every national singing contests you can including: American Idol, America’s Got Talent and The Voice. Go online to their websites and follow directions. You can audition in person or online by sending in a tape."Audition may times for the same contests. Some singers get on TV competition shows after their 4th or 5th audition. Don’t give up. Don't give up your dreams. If you are good, you are good, Keep putting yourself out there. Not everyone gets on but you never know. I’m just saying…don’t try once and give up. Be persistent.
It doesn't matter what state or country you are in...singing live will give you experience, confidence, help you develop a strong stage performance, better performance skills, an ability to handle and relate with audiences and an opportunity to grow your audience and collect their email so you can inform them of upcoming dates you sing.

So kids... you are welcome to share this BLOG with all of your parents or your music teachers. It's okay to let them know what you are up to, And you always want to go with a friend (or parent/sibling) when you are going to new places. You don't need to go alone. Let your parents know what you are doing. You can ask for help. Sometimes you will get it, sometimes you won't. When you don't, oh well... you just keep doing what you love to do. SING!!

You can't sit on your behind and quit or complain if no one in your family is helping you. My parents didn't help me become a singer and I have song on over 60 CD's a handful of commercials, my music has been in film, TV and on the radio. The fact is: often other musicians will help you more than your own family, or mentors and singing teachers like me. The other ...well they just don't understand.

Remember one will ever believe in your dreams more than you do. That's why they are YOUR dreams.

I look forward to working with you and guiding you to the Red Carpet, Award Shows, Recording Studio, CD Sales, and reading newspaper and magazine articles about YOU!

Believe In Yourself. I believe in you:)

Wendy Alane Wright'
The Hollywood Talent Manager
WAW Entertainment
(818) 203-6080

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